But first, let’s remind ourselves why “meaning” plays such a vital role in long-term success. Success typically starts with a vision: I want to be this, do that, and have these things - hopefully, in that order. As I’ve said before, these declarations are defined in the conscious mind. And yet, we know that achieving goals is predicated on getting the desires of the rational, conscious mind aligned with the actions and behaviors of the unconscious mind because the latter aspect of mind is really in charge. So in short, the successful have learned to bring the unconscious mind along by speaking its language: emotions.
I’m not talking about fear, revenge or even pride. Research has proven that these types of motivations are short-lived because they invite old behaviors to return once the risk is out of sight. However, positive, forward-facing emotions allure the unconscious mind to turn off the automatic pilot so we can get outside our comfort zone. And yet, some people will go an entire lifetime without knowing what stirs the deepest crevices of their soul, which is why purpose feels like an elusive concept for so many.
My search for meaning started with years of self-absorbed navel-gazing. Oh, I asked myself all the “right” questions: who I am, why am I here, what do I do well, what’s most important in my life, what are my interests, what has my life taught me so far, and now that I’m here, what am I meant to do – right now? I’m not discounting the process – it introduced me to the importance of meaning and changed my life. I exited that process knowing full well that I was supposed to be helping others to unleash their untapped potential. But, in retrospect, I am also aware that some of my answers came from my head, not my heart. And, here’s how I know the difference.
Last summer I was in Phoenix and took a quick two-day trip to Sedona with a colleague. If you’ve been to this magical place, you already know it’s the allure of the red rocks and nature’s untapped splendor that brings millions of tourists to this part of Arizona each year. On our second day we set an intention: find a vortex. A vortex is a site where the energy of an area is said to be concentrated and it is a great place to pray, meditate or heal. So, Sally and I embraced our new-aged Thelma and Louise personas and set off in the compact rental car with the vortex map from the visitor’s center and the pendulum we’d purchased hours earlier in-hand. Go ahead and laugh; we did.
And yet, that all changed for me when I sat at the base of the first mountain. We’d split up, and I sat uncomfortably on a rock in my attempt to meditate. The chatter of the morning ran through my head: how did I miss the rain forecast, I wish I’d had another cup of coffee, were we really at the right location. One minute passed. I continued to sit, and my thoughts slowed. Two minutes turned into five. There was more silence than chatter. I don’t know how long it was when the message came through to my consciousness, “It’s time for us to heal.”
The words didn’t make rational sense, but my body viscerally responded to the truth of the statement. Tears formed in my eyes.
Not long after that thought, a picture entered my awareness: it was a Native American Medicine Wheel. Months earlier I wouldn’t have recognized the symbol, but now I had an inlay of a medicine wheel in the foyer of a house my husband and I had purchased a few months earlier.
The concrete and copper wheel in our house was created by the original owner, Kitty Farmer. At the time, she was a literary agent. However, she would go on to leave the publishing industry, move from Washington State, and co-found the Medicine Wheel Foundation, which addresses the significant health disparities occurring in the Native American population. I had the chance to talk to Kitty about the wheel and her work, and afterward, was intrigued enough to watch the trailer of a documentary she was making, What’s in the Heart. The film, once completed, would highlight the cost of emotional wounds from past generations and explore the programs that are bridging allopathic and traditional native healing practices to assist the Native American communities to heal.
The words that flooded my conscious awareness that day were taken directly from that video, “It is time to for us to heal.”
This was a significant moment for me, because I’d been avoiding using the word “healing” to describe my work. And yet, on that day my heart opened and I heard those words as if they were my own. I knew I wanted to be a part of the movement to help people to self-heal in more non-conventional ways. My work would be different than Kitty Farmer’s, but in the global sense – it was the same. After all, my self-discovery had been surface until I learned how to open my heart. It was clear that the time had arrived to let go of my ego and listen to the whispers of my soul, which is where you find real purpose and meaning. And, you’ll know you found it when your emotions tell you so.
Today, those words – IT’S TIME TO HEAL - sit above my desk in the visual mapping goal work I did with Patti Dobrowolski a few months ago. It’s an icon that keeps me focused, inspired, courageous and clear. It fuels my work, and my life. It tells me why I exist, right now. And, it opens the door to the real principles of success.
This is a series of posts born from the post, The Real Secrets to Success. In our next post, we will explore the importance of Ecology to success.
